Break Free from Unhealthy Ties

When helping people in their relationships, we find people continually asking for a deeper connection, so that their love, support, and companionship are received and reciprocal. By breaking free from the shackles of unhealthy ties to agendas, comparisons, and vices, individuals can foster relationships that are grounded in authenticity, mutual respect, and personal growth. These healthier connections not only enhance emotional well-being but also serve as a foundation for a more fulfilling and harmonious life.

 Beneath the surface of seemingly healthy relationships, there can exist toxic elements that hinder personal growth and emotional well-being. Let’s identify these and break any unhealthy ties to agendas, comparisons, and vices that can taint our relationships, causing significant harm to ourselves and those around us. This is a great day for freedom! 

1. Timelines

Do you get impatient presuming things aren’t moving fast enough? Impatience is an unhealthy tie that can corrode the fabric of even the strongest relationships! When we struggle with impatience, we often prioritize immediate gratification over the long-term well-being of the partnership. Impatient behaviors can manifest as being short-tempered, demanding quick results, or constantly pressuring one's partner. These actions create tension, erode trust, and hinder effective communication. Impatience can also lead to impulsive decision-making, causing significant rifts in the relationship as important issues are not given the time and attention they deserve. By fostering patience and understanding, individuals can create a nurturing environment where growth, compromise, and trust can flourish.

Empowering Belief Suggestion: I can relax and be calm. When progress isn’t fast enough for me, I can trust God that He is working behind the scenes. God’s presence is my safe and calm retreat.  

2. Comparison 

In a society that glorifies perfection and success, we can fall into the trap of comparing ourselves and our families and kids to others. Comparisons can drive a wedge between us, and breed insecurities, resentment, and a constant feeling of inadequacy. When we compare our relationships to others, we fail to appreciate the unique qualities and dynamics within our partnerships. Instead, we should focus on cultivating gratitude and celebrating the strengths and growth in our relationships, fostering an atmosphere of love and support.

Empowering Belief Suggestion: Even if it doesn’t feel fair I can trust in God’s justice. I choose to smile and accept and expect abundance and promotion for my life and family. I am not alone, I am in partnership with God and His friendship vindicates me.  

3. Hidden Agendas

Hidden agendas can be sneaky, and we don’t even know we have them. Sub-consciously we are tied to unspoken expectations and agendas. These hidden motives can sabotage the authenticity of our connections and complicate our relationships with manipulation. All this, without even trying! 

It is crucial to be transparent and genuine in our intentions, communicating openly and honestly with our spouses, kids, and friends. The best way to be free of hidden agendas is to resist fear regarding others. The other important approach is to resist the temptation to think that others need to share the same values and convictions as you. This can be challenging when you’re in the same family! 

Empowering Belief Suggestion: Even though I have dreams, desires, and good ideas for my family and friends, I release them to have their own dreams and their journey. I trust Jesus to speak to their hearts, and I let go of my opinions. 

4. Vices

Unhealthy relationships often involve the presence of vices such as addiction or substance abuse. These destructive habits can erode trust, communication, and overall well-being within a relationship. Vices can create a toxic environment that is detrimental to personal growth and the vitality of the relationship. Breaking free from these vices includes having empathy for yourself and others and creating goals and asking for help and support. 

Empowering Belief Suggestion: I am not a disappointment to God, myself, or others. When I crave comfort, I immediately move toward my friendship with God in my secret place. I let go of the addictions that give me false comfort.  

5. Distractions

In a world filled with constant stimulation and demands on our attention, it is crucial to recognize the impact of these distractions and actively work to mitigate their influence. By prioritizing uninterrupted quality time, fostering open and attentive communication, and practicing mindful presence, we can navigate the distraction-filled landscape and build healthier and more fulfilling connections. Embracing intentional engagement with our loved ones allows us to forge deeper bonds and create a sense of belonging in an increasingly distracted world.

Empowering Belief Suggestion: I am courageous and wise. I value the gift of each day and the time I’ve been given. I forgive myself, and I focus on what’s important.  

6. Limited Beliefs

It’s so important to be aware of our inner dialogue! We can have unhealthy ties to our narrative, and remain unaware of the implications! The stories we tell ourselves create the trajectory of our lives. Telling yourself positive and life-giving faith-filled stories about your life, your future, the people around you, and your future is powerful and gives space for hope, possibilities, and answers to prayer.  

Empowering Belief Suggestion: I write the truth in my heart that’s in complete agreement with God’s promise for me and my future. I invest in heart beliefs that establish peace and wealth and Lordship with Jesus.  

7. Resentment 

Resentment breeds emotional distance, leading us to withdraw and withhold. Breaking the unhealthy ties of resentment is a powerful step toward newfound freedom! Lingering resentment prevents genuine closeness and impedes the cultivation of empathy and compassion. The emotional disconnection can manifest in a lack of affection and withdrawal. Overcoming resentment necessitates a willingness to empathize with one another's experiences, puts nerdy into practice, and fosters an atmosphere of emotional safety and support, and acceptance.  

Empowering Belief Suggestion: I sent away the offense of what that person said or did to me. This offense is not benefiting my life, and I don’t give it any more power. I turn and move towards the peace of God’s presence and I experience mercy for me, and I extend that mercy to others.   

Hear more about this on Episode 163 of the “All About Relationships” podcast with Bob and Audrey. 

Bob & Audrey Meisner